Going Backwards

11 08 2008

I’m officially 16 years old again.

I’m not even sure how to entirely write this post to convey exactly what it is that I’m feeling.

I am officially moved back into my folks place and am working at the movie store I worked in all through school. I have graduated University with an Honours degree in Commerce, I have had a well paying corporate job in downtown Toronto, I had what any person would consider “the life.” Now, I stand behind that counter of the movie store as I see my old highschool teachers walking in with their children asking me for movie recommendations. I feel compelled to give them my whole background of why I’m working here, and am not out curing cancer:

“Hello Mrs. X! Igraduatedfromuniversity,thenImovedtoTorontoandworkedforamultimilliondollarcorporation,thenImmovingto *deep breath * England, am justworkinghereparttimeuntilIgetallmyducksinarow, and,oh,no,I’mnotafailure” Yes, good to see you too, Mrs. X!”

It’s as though I’ve gone backwards through time. The people who started working there after me, are now my managers, and are also a great deal younger than I am.

The words to explain this feeling are escaping me right now…as is my pride.

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5 responses

11 08 2008
Alex

congrats on making the step out, i can imagine how it must feel. it takes a lot of courage to be true to yourself. best of luck!

11 08 2008
Matt

Nobody said change was easy.

11 08 2008
Anna

@Alex: Thanks for encouragement!
@Matt: You would know 🙂

11 08 2008
anthony

Hey, whatever gets you there… within its limits of course 😉

11 08 2008
Anna

@Anthony: That’s what I keep telling myself!

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